Marriage can be as stressing as it is fulfilling. Many problems in the marriage arise when couples neglect the small daily things that make the marriage stronger. More often than not, couples fall into habits that make it hard for them to enjoy married life. Most couples don’t realize how far apart they were grown. The truth dawns on them when finding themselves in a session with a marriage therapist.
Why not work to become that couple that not only looks great together but also enjoy each other’s company? Making your marriage stronger is not rocket science. Certain daily habits should be able to bring the two of you closer than before. They are everyday things you can do without spending a fortune. So, what habits can you build in your daily lives to make a stronger relationship?
Here are 31 daily habits that will make your marriage stronger:
1. Prioritize your marriage
Let your spouse and the world know that your marriage is the top most priority. Once you know that, making everyday decisions can be very easy. Every situation you are faced with will be assessed in terms of its effect on the marriage. So you can step back and ensure your marriage will be stronger before you commit to anything. When your marriage is on top of your priorities, you can never make decisions that will hurt it.
2. Greetings and goodbyes
Every time your marriage partner leaves or returns home, make it a big issue. You might want to give them a kiss, a hug or a shout of joy. Whatever you do for greetings or goodbyes, make sure you show them how important they are. By so doing, you will just make your marriage stronger.
3. Go to bed together
Some couples are so busy in their own worlds that they have to go to bed at different times. That mobile phone is the culprit in most of these cases. However, going to bed together gives the opportunity to be intimate in your marriage. For the partner who likes being up late, you can get back up as soon as your partner falls asleep. This can only make your marriage stronger.
4. Send text messages
If you are in a marriage, ensure you don’t get so engrossed in your day that you forget your partner. Surely, you can find some time during the day to send them some sweet text messages. According to the book Save Your Relationship by Anton Robin, texting can save your marriage. How else would you make sure you stay on top of their mind? If anything, you need to make every effort to remind your partner how you love and care for them. Frequent SMS should, therefore, make your marriage stronger.
5. Share your day’s Experience
To make your marriage stronger, you need to know what’s going on in each other’s lives. Ask about your partner’s day and talk about your own. Ensure you are listening as your partner shares their experiences. Get past the superficial and into what the events really mean. So make the conversation last for more than a minute. It is in moments like these that the intimacy in your marriage can be strengthened.
6. Share in a ritual
As a couple on marriage, you need to have a ritual you do together at least once a day. This should be your way of making your relationship unique. It could be having a cup of coffee together before you get home or praying together. Whatever it is, doing it consistently will make your marriage stronger. It should be something each one of you looks forward to each day. The very thing that adds oomph to your marriage.
7. Accept each other’s differences
In a 2011 article, Fawn writes about the importance of accepting each other’s differences. She says that some of the qualities that make our spouses different are definitely what make them great. You might have different passions, hobbies, and ideas for adventure. When you don’t seem to agree on certain things, acknowledge and accept your differences.
8. Compliment each another
When you have been in a marriage for a long time, it is normal to take your partner for granted. The small little compliments that mattered no longer make sense to either of you. Learn to tell your husband how handsome he is or your wife how beautiful she is. Find a way to appreciate each other and to make your marriage stronger. No matter how trivial it seems, it is bound to bring back the spark into your relationship.
9. Hold each other in a tight hug
Nothing can draw you closer than a nice warm cuddle in the morning and at night. It is a great way of reducing the distance between the two of you and becoming more intimate with each other. So learn to start and end each day in each other’s hands to grow closer together. It isn’t just a hug. Rather, it’s a focused moment you decide to consciously share with your partner. And who knows? You might just end up making your marriage stronger!
10. Say ‘thank you’
To show your partner how much you appreciate their efforts in the marriage, just say ‘thank you’. In his book Gratitude in Love, M J Ryan says being thankful can bring more joy in your marriage. It doesn’t matter what it is you are thanking each other for. You could thank your husband for taking you out for dinner and your wife for preparing a delicious supper. Only ensure you are expressing sincere gratitude for every effort your partner makes. Put in some passion and you make your marriage stronger.
11. Spoil each other
If you can spoil each other more frequently, why not? To make your marriage stronger, stop looking out for the bad things they did or the goods ones they didn’t do. Work to see who between the two of you can be nicer. So if your husband failed to take out the garbage, fold the laundry for him instead of growling. Also, you will do well in your marriage to assume the other person is always doing his or her best.
12. Speak your mind
Your spouse can see it when you deep in thought, whether out of frustration or sadness. So avoid keeping your thoughts inside so as to avoid an argument. After all, it will only arouse major problems when the issue that’s bothering you is left unsaid. However, speaking your mind will give the two of you the opportunity to resolve the issue. You, therefore, get to avoid creating major problems in your marriage.
13. Find small ways to spend time together
Most couples in marriage find it so easy to get caught up in their busy lives. They often forget to spend time together. You don’t have to be doing anything. The idea is to create time to be together. It could be something you do every evening like watching your favorite TV show. It shouldn’t be such a big thing or take long. Just half an hour in each other’s company can make your marriage stronger.
14. Flirt and have fun with each other
Marriage is like a marathon. You enter it for the long haul. You may get tired along the way so you need lots of motivation to keep going. Keeping the spark of flirtatious love alive and laughing together will make your marriage last longer. You definitely need the joy, especially during the hard days. When you flirt and laugh together, it shows you still appreciate each other’s company.
15. Make time for yourself
Even as you make time for your spouse, also ensure you set aside a few minutes to be just by yourself. When you are in a new relationship, you might think you should spend all the time together. That’s not true. Each one of you definitely needs time for your own hobbies, interests, and friends. It will make each one of your happier and in turn make your marriage stronger.
16. Be okay with being wrong
Some couples believe they must always have their way in the marriage. However, you don’t always have to be right. After all, making your marriage stronger should be more important than always being right. When each one of you insists on being right, you only escalate problems by creating new grounds for disagreement. So work on being okay to be the one in the wrong, sometimes. Say sorry, even for something you didn’t do.
17. Encourage each other
If you are in a marriage, there are times when you will have to go through a tough time. It could be a sickness or just loss of a job. Whichever partner is affected, they can really be down on themselves. Sometimes, just a little encouragement from your partner can boost your morale at a time when you are struggling. It can make you look at your life more positively as well as have hope you will get over it all.
18. Keep the house clean
What’s so romantic about doing the laundry? Nothing. However, you should go the extra mile to make a life for your spouse a little easier. This is as romantic as anything else you can do. So make dinner and clean up thereafter. When your partner comes home to a clean house, he is likely to appreciate you more. What if it was him doing the exact same thing for you? Wouldn’t that make your marriage stronger?
19. Be vulnerable with each other
Put yourself in a position where your partner could choose to hurt you. It may sound absurd, but making yourself vulnerable shows you trust your partner. Your partner knows you aren’t trying so hard to avoid being hurt by them. Your vulnerability tells your spouse you are ready for intimacy. So if you want to make your marriage stronger, make yourself more vulnerable. Learn to overcome your fear of getting hurt, let down or disappointed by moving out of your comfort zone.
20. Never go to bed angry
No matter how often you fight to ensure you never go to bed angry with each other. As hard as this may be, ensure you kiss and make up before you begin to drift apart. Going to bed angry only escalates the problem at hand. So why allow this to happen to your marriage? Disagreeing on some things and fighting over others should separate you. Get over your egos for the good of the relationship and makeup before you say ‘goodnight’.
21. Pray for each other, out loud
Often couples who pray together focus on things outside the marriage. Learn to pray for your spouse out loud, holding hands, and face-to-face. Let them hear you pray for their concerns, health, peace, and wisdom. You never know what may happen. God will definitely intervene and make your marriage stronger.
22. Kiss passionately
At the start of the relationship, you are likely to have had lots of passion going for the two of you. While the passion may have waned over time, it doesn’t have to remain so. Keep your intimacy alive by passionately. When you touch and feel the warm embrace of each other daily, you are sure to make your marriage stronger. So forget about the common stresses of life and kiss passionately to keep the initial fire burning.
23. Say ‘I love you’ always
In every situation, you go through, do it together with your spouse. Your marriage vows should mean something special – much more than the words used. You should be prepared to stick together no matter what and say ‘I love you’ to one another. It doesn’t matter what you’re going through. So never the basis of your love change. If you sincerely chose to enter that marriage, your love for each other should grow over time. It shouldn’t just be a mere fad that changes faster than the latest fashion trends. Saying ‘I love you’ on a daily basis should make your marriage stronger.
24. Go out on date nights
If you want to make your marriage stronger, go out on date nights more often. Taking time to spend with one another shows you know how precious your time together is. It doesn’t matter if you have children or not. These are the views of Patrick and Ruth Schwenk in their book For Better or for Kids. They say you ought to make up your mind to love your spouse, even with kids in the house. Date nights is something you must hold sacred. So avoid taking each other for granted and make time to go out. It doesn’t matter how brief the outing is.
25. Always think about your partner’s feelings
To have a much stronger marriage, you need to be empathetic to each other’s feelings. Putting yourself in your partner’s shoes enables you to understand just how they are feeling. Strong empathy is bound to make your marriage stronger. It gives you the emotional and mental power to see things through and build healthier relationships.
26. Travel and explore together
You don’t have to be rich to carry your spouse along on a long journey. Ensure you enjoy taking an adventure together with your marriage partner. Discovering the world together should create excitement even in a relationship that has grown dull. It exposes you to new cultures and creates new perspectives you didn’t have before.
27. Live below your means
In most marriages, the biggest problems arise from finances or lack of them. It’s how money is managed that creates problems in the marriage. Most people in marriages tend to overspend with many incurring consumer debts. So as a couple in a marriage, you need to be good financial stewards. If you are not, you might just end up causing chaos in this vital area of your life.
28. Drink wine together
If both of you drink, do it together. A study done by the Buffalo University Research Institute was done to find out the divorce rate in drinking couples. It suggests that couples who drink together have fewer chances of divorcing than those who don’t. So if you want to make your marriage stronger, go out drinking together.
29. Plan for sex and do it
Plan for sex just the same way you arrange to have a great conversation. The number of times you are intimate may vary from couple to couple. However, ensure you discuss each other’s expectations so you can know how far you can go. Make sure the sex you have is more about quality than the frequency of it. You will definitely grow closer and make your marriage stronger.
30. Take a walk together in the evening
If you have a burning issue you need to talk over with your spouse, simply take a walk together. The fresh air in the park could be the thing you need to clear your mind. Also, walking in the same direction should leave you feeling like you are reading from the same page. You might just find yourselves agreeing more on the issue at hand. It there any bigger way to make your marriage stronger?
31. When you go out to Dinner Sit together
Most couples who go out to restaurants like to sit across from each other. For a couple that wants to grow stronger together, sitting side-by-side is the better option. In this position, you have room to whisper in each other’s ears and to slide an arm around each other. If you think about it, this is a much more intimate position than sitting across each other. Do this often and your marriage will grow stronger.
Your marriage can greatly benefit if you can learn to practice these 31 habits. When going through hard times, it will be much easier to manage. With these habits, you will fill your good times with the best memories. After all, as Cliff Isaacson tells us marriage can be good for you. He says this in his book The Good-for-You Marriage. According to him, staying married can improve your health, prolong your life and ensure your happiness. So, why not make a go by taking up these good habits?